The New Cogito

The New Cogito

I think, therefore I am (not extended)

I think, therefore I am (made of two parts)

I think, therefore I am (not an animal)

I think, therefore I am (not getting out of bed today)

I think, therefore I am (never going to get married)

I think, therefore I am (not very popular)

I think, therefore I am (unemployable)

I think, therefore I am (no fun to be around)

I think, therefore I am (not going to get tenure)

I think, therefore I am (ill-coordinated)

I think, therefore I am (chronically constipated)

I think, therefore I am (not a university administrator)

I think, therefore I am (thought to be insane)

I think, therefore I am (at least a thing)

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